Do you ever feel like as soon as you mention the word depression, the person you tell it to flees as if you’re a terrifying monster in an old school, low budget horror movie?
I only just noticed recently that this is the case. People tend not to know how to deal with me when I mention I’m feeling depressed and even when I explain to them that all I need is acknowledgment that it is apparent and just to go about their day as if it was any other day and not letting the fact I am in a depressive state go to the forefront of the day, then everything will be okay.
For some reason nobody I have asked to do this will do it. They take on my depressive state and I spend most of that day worrying and trying to make them feel better instead of concentrating on making myself feel better which inevitably takes me twice as long to recover.
If I am feeling depressed it does not mean I have morphed into a flesh eating monster, it does not mean I suddenly have some sort of contractible disease that you will catch if you as much as look at me.
When I mention the word depressed my reaching out leaves me isolated. I am left in the darkness in which I am trying to escape. The door is slammed in my face and I am left to overcome so many obstacles before I can even think about feeling better.
I personally feel that my depression should not be spotlighted, it should be cast into the shadow where I am left so I can step into the light and start to feel me again.
If you ignore someone with depression you are hindering, not helping. You are in fact strengthening that state by showing them it is a problem. That they are alone. That they need to get better if they want you around. I do not think this is fair.
I know I have already said this in so many ways, but if someone you know is feeling depressed, do not flee from them. You do not have to do anything spectacular, just be there. Do not let it be the focal point of the day. Seriously, just be there like it was any other day. You do not understand how much this helps.
Ignore the depression, not the person suffering from it. Depression is the monster, but depression does not make the person. It is merely a shadow and you could very well be the light.
My depression does not have to take the smile from your face, do not let it. Do not let it get you as it got me. Just know that is not your responsibility to make me feel better, so please stop putting the pressure on yourself or you are simply letting it win.
I am sorry this post is all over the place, but as you may have guessed by now, I am not having the greatest of days. Thank you if you made it this far though and I hope it makes sense.
Until next time, be the sunshine that I know you are.