#28DayBlogChallenge Day 9 – My Worst Enemy

I don’t think I’m the first or the last to say this, but I truly am my own worst enemy. Any sign of happiness and my brain pretty much says “Hey, what is this? You aren’t allowed to be happy; let’s see how we can mess this up!” And then I proceed to royally screw up anything good in my life. I have broken my own heart on more than one occasion.Β 

Well, that is until now. I do suffer from bouts of depression and have more anxiety attacks than I care to admit, but in the past I just laid down and took it. I let it consume me. I told myself I’d just have to wait it out until it passed. Unfortunately that could take a few days to a few months and this was not healthy for my body or my mind.

The past couple of months I have been determined not to stay in the darkness for longer than necessary. I have kept myself busy and my mind active and it truly has helped coax me into a better state of mind all in all. At this point I just hope it sticks. I want all parts of me to work together to be a better person. Hating myself made me feel weak and ugly and sometimes I truly did hate my existence.

For now the battles with myself are few and far between and I couldn’t be happier with the progress. I know there is a long road ahead before I can truly say I am better, but so far so good and I couldn’t ask for more than that.

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22 thoughts on “#28DayBlogChallenge Day 9 – My Worst Enemy

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  1. I am the same way I would have to say that 85% of my anxiety and depression is brought on by my own brain. Let’s all help each other to keep focused on not letting it drag us down not let it destroy us but to make ourselves stronger. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I am just like you. I especially liked your line, ‘I have broken my own heart on more than one occasion. ; – when things go well for me I overthink and self destruct. I love the ways you have outlined how to overcome this. Keeping yourself busy, that is so important. When I am left alone with myself for too long my thoughts get ugly. It’s good you say ‘so far so good’ – it’s good to accept who you are and keep trying! I wish you all the best. This post was inspiring.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you. What you said means a lot. Although it is often negativity that connects people, I find that sharing experiences broadens perspectives and can lead to us learning for the better. It’s always nice to find the silver lining. πŸ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

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